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Listening
Each of us encounters people in life who seem to draw other people's confessions like a magnet. Towbin studied this phenomenon and described his impressions in an article. He spoke with people who make others want to talk about themselves. One of them said: “For as long as I can remember… people have always opened up to me. I think it happens mostly because I listen to people. I talk a lot myself, but I also listen. I would say that most people do not listen to others. They simply do not hear… But I really listen, I think about what people tell me, and I begin to understand them. I become aware of their feelings because I am aware of my own as well.”
Listening 🎧 is a key skill that gives our interactions with other people genuine depth and meaning. In a world where speed and information often outweigh quality and substance, the ability to truly listen is becoming rare. Receptivity to another person's words and experiences allows people to build closer and more trusting relationships. Genuine listening requires not only attention, but empathy — the ability to resonate with and understand the person we are speaking with.
The passage from Polster's work illustrates this dimension of communication especially well. In psychology, the ability to listen to and understand a person can itself have a therapeutic quality. This is especially important for mental-health professionals such as psychotherapists, who use the art of listening to help clients develop self-awareness, process emotions, and find ways through their difficulties 🛤️.
For a modern reader living amid constant informational noise, listening is even more relevant as a skill. It can improve both personal and professional relationships while deepening our own understanding of the inner world. 🌐 Recognizing the value of listening can change the way we experience interaction and teach us to hear not only words, but also the feelings behind them. When we truly listen, we give a part of ourselves to another person — and that contribution can create strong and reliable relationships in our lives.
Category: Psychotherapy
Questions about this article
01How does genuine listening differ from simply staying silent?
Genuine listening involves sustained attention, reflection on what was said, and an effort to understand the feelings and meaning behind the words. The listener does not merely wait for a turn to speak.
02Why is it easier to confide in some people?
The cited account connects this with truly listening and being aware of both another person's feelings and one's own. Such presence can create a sense of acceptance and safety, though it does not guarantee disclosure.
03Can attentive listening replace psychotherapy?
No. It can be supportive and therapeutic in a broad sense, but it does not replace professional assessment or treatment where those are needed.